I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
This show inspires me to have sex in space
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Randomize
