She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
