was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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