I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I DEMAND FORESKIN
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
