their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
