I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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