So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. �Hello 29...
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
