soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
When are your genitals available?
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
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