1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
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