i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
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