Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
