I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
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