is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
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