whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
We had sex on a dog bed..
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize