The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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