get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
The upside of Thirsty Thursdaying with the client last night was that he was so hungover that he didn't want to spend time wrangling over the contract extension this morning.
Boss just said I'm getting a bonus for this. Want to celebrate our anniversary a week early tonight?
This is why I married you.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
