Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
