oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
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