I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
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