: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
why didn't you poke me back
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Randomize
