is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
