I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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