Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize
