just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
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