I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Randomize
