Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
