Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Randomize
