I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Randomize
