i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
