I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Randomize
