I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
now i know why i became what i already was.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
