he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Randomize
