did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
