she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
