ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
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