and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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