Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
