this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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