Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize