He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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