Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
