dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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