whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Just fell off a train. Bad.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
