I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
In America we eat man semen.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Randomize
