I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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