Yo dont text me then not text me
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
