Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Randomize