you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
