I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
meet me or not, i'm out of control
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
