my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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